So why...?

So why…? So why…?

You can’t expect things to work out

And then not work to work them out

Your logic is illogical
And we both know you’re acting out

A mild dose of thievery

And you can’t tell yourself: “It’s me…”

You can’t hit the bottle and clearly see

You can’t just sit and expect pity

You can’t smoke until you’re surrounded in haze

You can’t sit on the floor while it eats your gaze

You can’t walk around aimlessly for the rest of your days

And you sure as hell can’t go on living this way

So why…? So why…?
Can’t you pick yourself up?!?

Hate them all first before they get a chance to love…

You can’t expect them to come back again

When you subject them to this pain

You can’t calm yourself by taking it out on them

Your logic is illogical, time and again

You can’t expect them to know how you feel

You can’t keep hoping it isn’t real

You can’t bargain your way out, can’t make a deal

And you sure as hell can’t keep thinking your fate is sealed

You can’t keep getting down when things don’t go your way

You can’t keep thinking she’ll stumble upon you one day

You can’t worry about what your may or may not say

And seriously stop longing for better days

So why…? So why…?

Can’t you can’t stop hiding your heart

Why can’t you stop thinking things will fall apart?

You can’t torment the people you call friends

You can’t use them as a means to an end

You can’t break relationships because you’re too stubborn too mend

You can’t hurt when hearing “Let’s just be friends…”

You can’t continue to mull and write

You can’t expect that to make things right

You can’t expect them to see from your line of sight

When what you keep showing them is dark as night

So why…? So why…?

Can’t you see this wasn’t the man you set out to be?

So when exactly will you find “me”…?

4th Floor Lies

4th floor view; nothing new
Trying to find a verse to slip into
Happily screwed with nothing to use
Thinking of you, but what else is new?


Preconceived notions; ill-conceived motions
But nothing good enough to make waves in this ocean
Said and done? Lost or won?
And all is silent except for the internal commotion


Think I'll go and take a nap
And mentally never come back
Think I'll look you in the eye
And know that this is where I'll lie...


4th floor scrawling a distant view
An understanding of how I blew it with you
...you've gotta tell me, or I won't know what to do...
I wish I could tell you, and avoid someone else having to


They say, "Don't believe a word he's told..."
They say, "He's grown fond of being an asshole..."
They say, "If this keeps up he'll lose his soul..."
But I assure you this wasn't my original goal


Think I'll go and take a snooze
Until, these thoughts, you're ready to lose
Come get me when you can look me in the eye
And know that this is where I'll lie


Thoughts of perfection trounced by apathy
Half of me wishing I could get back that half of me
Locked in thoughts without a single key
Until people see what they don't want to see


4th floor emergencies tended to by flashing trucks
What happens when no one's a goose and we're all ducks?
Embrace the feathered oddity or else this game sucks
Write at the point where I don't give a f~~~


Think I'll go and take a nap
And dream up a day without this crap
Think I'll forever long for blond framed eyes
And know that this is where I'll lie...

Myth vs. Fact

Look through the list of my contacts

Separate the myths from the facts

Ignore the life that distracts

And find a way to find a way

Look through the pages of my books

Separate the good from the dirty looks

Ignore the life that only took

And find a way to finally say

Look through the names I’ve now forgot

Separate the cold from the truly hot

Ignore the life that forgets me not

And find a way to finish the day

Look through the windows that I have open

Separate the now from the then

Ignore the life that keeps happening again

And find a way to feel that way

Look through the list of my contacts

Separate the myths from the facts

Ignore the life that won’t call me back

And go the way I wanted to go yesterday

Unintentional Sociopath

Say the word, but never speak

Always find yet never seek

We revel in the aftermath

We live the life of a sociopath

I get everything you have to give

I dictate the way you live

I’ll have you singing Ave Maria

And you’ll believe it was all your idea

Everything will go my way

You’ll cling to what I have to say

You’ll do exactly what I want you to do

Foolishly believing you wanted to

Say the word, but never speak

Always find yet never seek

We revel in the aftermath

We live the life of a sociopath

I don’t care how it’s achieved

So long as you’re the one deceived

I have no shame, I just have fun

You’ll never know it was me when I’m done

I know how to give the truth a spin

And watch it go until I win

Never start the fire, just fan the flame

You’re all just pawns within my game

Say the word, but never speak

Always find yet never seek

We revel in the aftermath

We live the life of a sociopath

Excuse me for not being able to empathize

I find it funny that you’ll never realize

Your virtuosity feeds my vice

And I’ll eat it up without thinking twice

Meticulously done pathologically

Lying here for all to see

Unless, of course, we’re talking about you

In which case you’ll keep doing what I want you to

Say the word, but never speak

Always find, yet never seek

I revel in the aftermath

But I never wanted to be this sociopath…

Sweet 'n Sour

Wake up from a day of unending night

Open my eyes, but nothing’s worth my sight

Open my mind and it pours out contrite

And oh, what I wouldn’t give for one more night

Escalate to being extra lazy

Sober up, only if you’re crazy

Smoke ‘em if you got ‘em; make it hazy

Question normality and see what they see

Half a bottle is just a taste

And we countdown ‘til we’re shitfaced

Revel in the useless and feel misplaced

To pour out your soul would just be a waste

We’ve lost a friend, but found a new one in a can

Sip on remorse and question the plan

Spin through the wind, like the blades of a fan

A night on the town is all we demand

Shame dissolves while pain disappears

Inhibitions run, as well as our fears

Waterfalls; watch them all; stow away the tears

Hey! They shout, and I realize, I’ve been sitting still for years

Get up from the ground to fall down this hole

Unending confusion makes me question my role

They want me to achieve them before I’ve even set goals

Down the hatch to sully even more of this soul

They ask for a lot, but don’t know how to give

We have so much fun, but still don’t know how to live

We clutter it up, and just don’t know how to sieve

Drink to forget the memories we can’t relive

You’re passed out on the floor and wishing she was there

She’s asking for more, but he just doesn’t care

You’ve been told they’re out there, but the question is: Where?

Miss; love; hate; ignore their piercing stare

I don’t care about your drama; you were asking for it

I don’t care about your bull, when I have to deal with my own shit

I don’t know if she’ll come back, but you’re growing decrepit

I don’t know if he’s safe and sober, so just deal with it

Escalate to being extra crazy

To quit indulging now would just be lazy

Smoke ‘em if you want ‘em; chain ‘em like daisies

I question what I’m doing but the answer comes faintly

Just put down the bottle, no one needs to die today

Just lay off the throttle and think about what you want to say

Slump down defeated, and get tanked on dismay

It may not have been before, but now it’s the only way

Your friend becomes my friend, I suppose

We polish them off until everything glows

Can’t tell if this is funny, and no one really knows

It wasn’t this way before, but I guess this is how it goes

Hey! They shout again, and I can once again feel my feet

I’ve got to play this off; I’ve got to be discreet

Smile and nod to every glazed over eye I meet

Hide away my hydrous friend, until I’m ready to repeat