Sweet 'n Sour

Wake up from a day of unending night

Open my eyes, but nothing’s worth my sight

Open my mind and it pours out contrite

And oh, what I wouldn’t give for one more night

Escalate to being extra lazy

Sober up, only if you’re crazy

Smoke ‘em if you got ‘em; make it hazy

Question normality and see what they see

Half a bottle is just a taste

And we countdown ‘til we’re shitfaced

Revel in the useless and feel misplaced

To pour out your soul would just be a waste

We’ve lost a friend, but found a new one in a can

Sip on remorse and question the plan

Spin through the wind, like the blades of a fan

A night on the town is all we demand

Shame dissolves while pain disappears

Inhibitions run, as well as our fears

Waterfalls; watch them all; stow away the tears

Hey! They shout, and I realize, I’ve been sitting still for years

Get up from the ground to fall down this hole

Unending confusion makes me question my role

They want me to achieve them before I’ve even set goals

Down the hatch to sully even more of this soul

They ask for a lot, but don’t know how to give

We have so much fun, but still don’t know how to live

We clutter it up, and just don’t know how to sieve

Drink to forget the memories we can’t relive

You’re passed out on the floor and wishing she was there

She’s asking for more, but he just doesn’t care

You’ve been told they’re out there, but the question is: Where?

Miss; love; hate; ignore their piercing stare

I don’t care about your drama; you were asking for it

I don’t care about your bull, when I have to deal with my own shit

I don’t know if she’ll come back, but you’re growing decrepit

I don’t know if he’s safe and sober, so just deal with it

Escalate to being extra crazy

To quit indulging now would just be lazy

Smoke ‘em if you want ‘em; chain ‘em like daisies

I question what I’m doing but the answer comes faintly

Just put down the bottle, no one needs to die today

Just lay off the throttle and think about what you want to say

Slump down defeated, and get tanked on dismay

It may not have been before, but now it’s the only way

Your friend becomes my friend, I suppose

We polish them off until everything glows

Can’t tell if this is funny, and no one really knows

It wasn’t this way before, but I guess this is how it goes

Hey! They shout again, and I can once again feel my feet

I’ve got to play this off; I’ve got to be discreet

Smile and nod to every glazed over eye I meet

Hide away my hydrous friend, until I’m ready to repeat

Photographs Again

Photographs of those attached

And you say one day you’ll know

A heart devoid of a suitable match

And that’s just the way things go

I look on with quiet regret

At the faces that could have been

An effort on my part was needed

But then again, that was then

An anger that passes in an instant

And he stands in a solemn confusion

He pleads with life for understanding

As it hides how it will use him

A brother in the doorway

Unable to say what needs to be said

No tears, as this one’s empty

Is this really where we’ve been led?

As liquid takes the body

And smoke absorbs the mind

He looks to me for an answer

But nothing here, will he find

Photographs of those attached

And they say love knows no bounds

So why is it he sits still

Unable to be found?

They look on with a silent pity

They don’t say it but I know

Seemingly, my only better half

Following me wherever I go

An anger that’s ultimately useless

At this half that doesn’t exist

An anger that remains, regardless

So what exactly did I miss?

A brother in the open

With a heart not afraid to hide

If only it were useful

But it remains locked inside

A solid place to place my feet

And a soft one to lay my head

A heart to share my heart’s weight

But none of this should have to be said

Photographs of those attached

And I say one day I’ll know

But the words have lost their meaning now

And I pray that’s not just the way things go…

WhatsHerName

We do these things

Not because they’re easy but because they’re hard

But since when is it easy

To leave each other broken and scarred?

As I continue to search

For what’s-her-name?

I look on at those around

Already enjoying the game

The paper money falls

And our boxes start to wear

I’ve passed go countless times

But still no one is there

I watch as they come together

And then close in upon me

I watch as they fade into

A lime-lit obscurity

But I don’t appear to them

Though I’m not quite nothing

And since when did noticing

Mean you had to say something?

The 3^rd wheel’s getting no grease

But I’m not antsy for attention

And if I didn’t think it would kill you

I’d ask for an honorable mention

Now there’s an internal conversation

That’s bred from an internal conflict

Now there’s an external situation

That’s making me feel sick

Dry heaves left me questioning

Is it me? Or is it everyone else?

Can I go ahead and blame the world?

Or have I just done this to myself?

Out of the cold grows a weed

And it bears resentment from it’s stem

So I’m not going to ignore it,

But I just might ignore all of them

And I have all the time in the world

To sit, hear, and wait

While you figure out what’s wrong with me

Before it gets late

But if it isn’t obvious yet

Then it’s something you’ll never get
Hello what’s-your-name,

I don’t believe we’ve met…

Change of Heart

It was just another day in a colder climate

As I found myself once again questioning my fate

I kept going over and over what I said and what they said

When I saw myself standing outside my own head

So I walked in and saw myself waiting for me

And all I said to myself was “Is this really how you want it to be?”

It was just another day surrounded by snow too deep

When I called upon her to soothe me back to sleep

I keep going over what it is they say and do

And wonder if I’ll ever stop wondering, “Where are you?”

You gave light to a page that I had yet to see

And all I said to myself was “Is this really how you want it to be?”

It was just another day near lukewarm hearts

As I found myself hating how they all got their starts

I wanted nothing more than to have one that did smolder

And I might tell you one day when you’re older

Just tell me as soon as you see what I see

And until then I’ll keep asking myself “Is this really how you want it to be?”

Dedicated to a feeling that’s no really there

Dedicated to finding a start

Dedicated to the only one who seems to care

Dedicated to a heartening hart

It was just another day in which I wrote another tale

I stood by the same old product and tried to make a sale

I kept repeating what they all thought needed to be said

And then I saw you standing beautifully inside my head

So I ran in and saw myself suddenly set free

As you explained that these words aren’t for them, but just for me…