I am...

I am here to tell you I am

I am here on life’s whim

I am here to do remarkable things

I am here to do absolutely nothing

I am 6 foot 10 and have a twin brother

I am from Minnesota but came to Cali. to discover

I am always in love with the one who loves another

I am only myself, and no other

I am constantly laughing at jokes only I get

I am constantly trying my best to forget

I am not one for risk, and not one to bet

I am more in love with the women I haven’t met

Half-way to being hammered

Nine inches from being nailed

Dead winds and no oars

Make me wonder how I’ve sailed

I am a musician and a writer

I am a not a full-fledged fighter

I am a listener and an observer

I am a half-assed part-time server

I am not opposed to taking mental days

I am not too dead set in my ways

I am looking for that _____-haired girl

I am trying to travel around the world

I am cocky to the point when I don’t want to be

I am pretty sure that I am presently me

I am educated, but often feel dumb

I am friend to more than just some

Half-way to being hammered

Nine inches from being nailed

Lazy lakes and listless laments

Make me wonder how I haven’t failed

I am of the notion there’s something big at play

I am one for words and yet don’t always know what to say

I am generally falling for the ones I can’t have

I am longing for things I know won’t last

I am not a fan of DBG

I am outgoing, but don’t want people to see

I am home to thoughts I can’t express

I am still searching for that beautiful mess

I am writing to tell you I am here

I am writing without regret or fear

I am writing because I know you’ll never see

I am writing because it calms me

Nine inches from being nailed

Half-way to being hammered

I am hoping you’ll soon see

That over you, I’m positively enamored

Ashes

Nickeled and knocked out

Bloodied and blocked off

Locked in to being locked out

Nicked but still can’t knock it off

A knack that isn’t shocking

Cocked but no one’s knocking

Stocked but no one’s flocking

Shocked that I’m still talking

Took while no one was looking

Ate what no one was cooking

Shook with no reason to be shaking

Taken by what isn’t mine for the taking

Thousands of islands

And no land upon which to stand

A demand to understand

Handed things that weren’t planned

Tanned faces that ought be banned

Randomness that I hope gets canned

Stand-up people I cannot stand

“Man up and just take her hand!”

Telling tales of the torn tall

Ashes… ashes… we all fall

Shook with no reason to be shaken

Looked her in the eyes and was instantly taken

Rhymes that continue to chime

Climb out of my head primed

Dimed by all the pantomimes

Slime just searching for the sublime

Find limelight that blinds the mind

Mime my emotion to earn a dime

I’m hiding out from all their crimes

I’m hoping things will tell in time

Nonsense rolls like common sense

Dispenses me with great finesse

Shaken, taken, and utterly bereft of defense

Praying this suspense will soon condense

I do declare that it’s all hot air

Impaired by smooth liquid despair

Midair upon a wing and a prayer

Prepared to go most anywhere

Solitary until someone cares

Wary of a likely love affair

Ensnared by that one’s debonair

Aware that I must take it there

Shook with a reason to be shaken

Looked her in the eyes and was instantly taken

I recall that all this is simply stalling

Ashes… ashes… And I think I’ve fallen...

Ever Again

I’m stuck in an area covered by ashes of steel

And I wonder if I’ll ever again be able to feel

I’m travelling a land of gods, hicks and hooves

And I wonder if I’ll ever again be able to move

I’m losing myself, but finding an old friend again

And I wonder if I’ll ever again remember then

I’m moving forward toward a roller coaster

And I wonder if I’ll ever again be able to cause a stir

I’m running in a race that she’s already won

And I wonder if I’ll ever again find the one

I’m feeling a sense of destroying delight

And I wonder if I’ll ever again sleep for a night

I’m stuck in an area covered by ashes of steel

And I wonder if I’ll ever again be able to feel

I’m traveling a land of gods, hicks and hooves

And I wonder if I’ll ever again be able to move

I’m listening to the flowers, while staring at wall

And I wonder if I’ll ever again be able to fall

I’m gazing at the stars that can no longer direct

And I wonder if I’ll ever again have that affect

I’m falling in the open while the future closes in

And I wonder if I’ll ever again be able to win

I’m writing in the dark with only a neon glow

And I wonder if I’ll ever again completely know

I’m stuck in an area covered by ashes of steel

And I wonder if I’ll ever again be able to feel

I’m traveling a land of gods, hicks and hooves

And I wonder if I’ll ever again be able to move

I’m staying up late with the memories I keep

And I wonder if I’ll ever again be able to sleep

I’m fading out white noise and listening to nothing

And I wonder if I’ll ever again find that something

I’m immortalizing memories with pen and paper

And I wonder if I’ll ever again forget her

I’m ending it on my terms before it’s even begun

And I wonder if I’ll ever again be seeing that one

I’m stuck in an area covered by ashes of steel

And I wonder if I’ll ever again be able to feel

I’m traveling in a land of gods, hicks and hooves

And I wonder if I’ll ever again be able to move

I’m avoiding the truth so that I can stay miserable

And I wonder if I’ll ever again be stable

I’m longing for love, and hoping for happiness

And I wonder if I’ll ever again find a beautiful mess

I’m looking to the future, and finding the past

And I wonder if I’ll ever again make it last

I’m searching the stars and combing the land

And I wonder if I’ll ever again hold that hand

I’m stuck in an area covered by ashes of steele

And I wonder if I’ll ever again be able to feel

I’m traveling in a land of gods, hicks and hooves

And I wonder if I’ll ever again be able to move…

Sunken Driving

White eyes out of the dark that haunt with their gaze
While rust colored leaves paint the streets like a haze
Just trying to find what I'm searching for these days
Lost in lust trying to relinquish old ways


Driving around trying to find that sensation
Sensing it's over now as I lose motivation
Rain pouring down while the roads get slick
And all through the night I've got a love I can't kick


Memories of you, and her, and the other
And even the one who wanted another
All from a time I can't seem to escape
All in my mind together I scrap


Driving through puddles I wish were oceans
Hoping to drown my car in one motion
Looked into the future where I longed to be
And realized I can no longer picture it for me


The moon fades to black as I sip my drink
I flood and imbibe because I'm too down to think
Just pick me up where I last left off
And point me in a direction where I won't hear them scoff


Tired and delirious; about ready to collapse
I'm sick of falling into their disarming traps
Open my eyes to see nothing at all
Just a broken ambition while tears start to fall


Will I wake up tomorrow and find someone to meet?
Will I wake up tomorrow and find my feet?
Has tomorrow come and gone, before I have time to think?
Have I suddenly found myself with too much to drink?


Here's where I'd take the first line and repeat
And make just enough changes that are seemingly discrete
But instead tonight, while my sunkenness is thriving
I'll end it here and just continue on driving....