The Same

I stepped out today

Where I went, I can’t really say

Couldn’t shake feeling hollowed

Pretty sure I’m being followed

I called every single phone

Still surprised that no one’s home

I stopped and yelled your name

A continuation of the same

I stepped out today

Where I went, I can’t really say

Couldn’t stand the feeling anymore

Never opened a window after closing that door

Head for the hills in a vane escape

I’m not surprised it’s covered in red tape

I stopped and yelled out your name

A continuation of the same

Come outside and sit beneath the sun

Come outside and fix what’s been undone

Out here where we know each other’s thoughts

We can be all the things that we are not

Wade and wallow in pristine tides

Allow the world to just subside

We stopped and each offered a hand to claim

A hopeful continuation of the same

Come outside and sit beneath the sun

Come outside and fix what’s been undone

No one ever said that it was going to be effortless

But if you trust in me, we can forget that mess

I’ll jump over the moon, if it suits you

Put on your shoes, and walk miles to you

We stopped and each offered a hand to claim

A hopeful continuation of the same

I returned home today

Where I’d been I can’t really say

Seeing the world made me think of you a bit

How I’d rather be with you, than tangled up in it

Wrapped up in the unending seasons

Struggling to find just one of life’s reasons

Their faces meant nothing and are easily replaced

I was haunted until your touch erased

I wander in cold but warm up to your flame

Ever thankful that you remain the same

I Was Young And Dumb

I was young and dumb

When she said, “Don’t fall in love.”

Just ecstatically numb

When I was in infatuation

I can laugh about it now

Looking back I didn’t know how

How to calm my beating heart

How to be romantically smart

But I never blamed her for shaking my soul

I merely questioned God about His goal

I thought He was having a good laugh

A cruel joke at my expense

And the fact that I couldn’t understand

Made the pain more intense

But I was young and dumb

And never was in love

Too lonely to say “Enough”

Too afraid to toughen up

I didn’t want her to leave

At the cost of my own sleep

I didn’t want her to go too

Though I think I always knew

That we weren’t supposed to be two

But with what I learned, I grew

No more blaming God or nature

Just because I was unsure

No more blaming circumstance

When I was lucky to have a chance

No more damning the idea of romance

Because I couldn’t dance

But I was young and dumb

And didn’t want to believe

That what works for some of them

Might not work for me

I grew sick of only seeing

Watching. Begging God. I was pleading

Wondering when would be the day

That I might get to say

That she was mine not someone else’s

That I’m the only one that she’s with

It eats you up on the inside

And starts to play tricks on your mind

The longing starts to consume you

And you’re no longer surprised

That you don’t know what the hell to do

But I’m young and dumb

And might have learned from this one

But I guarantee this shit is far from over

I guarantee you it’s far from done

With a glance across the horizon

I find myself with tunnel vision

I wake up with a heavy heart

But shrug it off with precision

Because I’m under the impression

That I’m not the only one waiting

She looks for me as I look for her

Meaning there’s not point hesitating

And I’ll find her one-day

And be taken by storm

We’ll ride together on tidal waves

The fiercest love, in purest form

Proofing the Truth

Be they poems or rhymes

Or otherwise mind games

They come across best

When they’re not the same

Because it’s all been said before

And that’s been said before

And the more you hear the same

The more you start to ignore

The best of the best

Don’t speak the language like the rest

They find if from their deepest depths

So that it doesn’t end up

With everyone else’s mess

So I could write about how

I’m abnormally tall

Because it’s new to some of you

And would attract you all

Or I could write about how

I’m seemingly depressed

But how I try to make it the best

I smile, once in a while

Try not to fit in like the rest

I could write about how I’m searching

For my Miss “plain and tall”

The girl who’ll stop the world

The girl who’d stop it all

All the pains and loves strains,

All the deranged demands

Of this lonely man

I could write about how I’m itching to please

Each and every one of these

People who can’t realize

It’s all just scrapped knees

And still knowing my problems

They continue to tease. Sweet G’s!

Would be nice in my life

So I guess I could write

About my money strife

But who the hell cares

Where my money goes

When everyone knows

That gold only glitters

Then it simply begins to litter

Turns the inside out

And makes sweet people bitter

So it might be a while

Before I give you anything good

But I’m proofing for the truth

And isn’t that how it should be?

Creativity for you

Inspired by what you all give to me.

Waiting

Follow me around
And let me lead you astray
Let's just run from it all
And maybe come back one day

Take my hand and ask me sweetly
Where exactly we are going
And I'll reply so softly
That there's no way of knowing

But then it doesn't really matter
And I've always kind of known
That so long as I'm with you
I know that I am not alone

Then you take off from here in a sprint
And I'll just watch you go
Waiting patiently for your return
I know you'll come back... I know

But you lose yourself out there
And you fly away from me
But I'll wait because I know
You're just trying to be free

But then you don't return
And I'm at a loss for language
I just sit and watch the horizon
For what seems like ages

Longing for the day
That you appear in front of me
Longing for the day
That you want to be with me

And I'll wait here and watch
Because I have nowhere else to be
And I'll wait here and think
Of that face I long to see

And though the years may pass
They will never know
How I've secretly longed for more
And the pain I'll never show

And I'll just wait a little longer
Because that's what true love does?
And if you never come back to me
Then I guess that's how it goes

And while my heart will be broken
Time and time again
I'll wait a little longer
And I'll try to bare the pain

You can pass me off as naive
Or as a man who's lost his head
But I'll sit here and wait
Hoping you haven't been misled

They may say I'm losing focus
But I've just lost what's worth focusing on
Call me crazy because I'm still hoping
That you'll come back when all is said and done

...And I find it hard that life goes on...And I find it hard that no one cares...And I find it hard that I'm impatient...And I find it hard that you're not here...And I find it hard to understand...And I find it hard to just go on...And I find it hard to just give up...And I find it hard to just move on...















And even if you did come back
I can't say that I'd be here
And even if you loved me back
I can't say I'd love you dear

I can't do this anymore
I can't sit while time goes on
Leave me here in my sad state
Leave me here, I think I'm done...

~__________~

Youthful exuberance
Or so I was told
Under a spell
Reveling in what I did behold

Still I can't help it
Missing you every day
I wish it wasn't so
Longing turns to dismay
Every day turns out the same

I can't contain myself
So you'll probably want to go

But please remember this:
I love your smile so
The thought of nothing else
The thought of no one there
Ever wish that you could just
React like you don't care?

So please remember this
When you wonder if I care:
Every time I see your smile
Every time it's worthwhile
Thought you ought to be aware

Questions

What exactly is it,
That you mean to me?
What exactly will it take,
For me to be free?
When will the day come,
When they'll want to come to me?
Why is it every place,
In which I see her face?
Who exactly set the pace,
To this never ending race?

Trying. Waiting. Wishing. Praying.
Finding it hard to continue staying.

Where will I go,
When I don't even know?
Where will you be,
When I come looking for me?
Why isn't it enough,
That I'm simply here?
Why can't I admit,
That I no longer care?

Eying. Trying. Complying. Praying.
Finding it hard to continue staying.

When can I stop asking,
How long will it be?
When will we stop,
Focusing on you and me?
How do I decide?
What do you even see?
What exactly is it,
That you mean to me?

Lying. Denying. Assuming. Praying.
Finding it hard to see why I'm still staying...

Just Another Day

And they think I can’t hear

The words that they say

But they come across quite clear

And it’s just another day

They talk all hushed

And they try to hide their stares

They think that I don’t know

But I’m completely aware

I catch their eyes

And I shake my head

I’ve already heard them all

No originality in what they said

But I just go about my business

Nothing I haven’t experienced

They marvel, like they’re the first

But there isn’t a comment that I’ve missed

And I can guess their questioning

I’m about three steps ahead

Still they walk up shy and ask

Because they know not where they tread

And it begins again…

How tall are you?

Do you get that a lot?

Do you play basketball?

Why the hell not?

How tall is your dad?

How tall is your mom?

Are you still growing?

Or are you almost done?

It would appear that you’ve caught me

On a very good day

And I’ll answer your questions, but first…

…Go away…

What Can't Be Written On Paper

Searching for secrets

To try and gauge those thoughts of his

She would hunt but never find

Anything among his pages.

Looking for something

Of interest to her

She scoured his pages

Only to find empty words.

A mystery perhaps?

He hid it quite well

She could just ask him

But knew he’d never tell.

A game perhaps?

He loved to play

Knowing as long as she questioned

She’d continue to stay.

Something for her to want

Or so he thought

She knew that wasn’t true

But he did not.

She would follow him around

Hoping he’d leave himself open

Let his guard down, and she’d pry

But sadly she’d have to keep hoping

He was made of stone

And only told her what she needed

He never told her what she wanted

Even when she pleaded

And then one day

When he was tired of playing

He opened his head

And to her started saying:

“I’m afraid if I say it

There’ll be no reason for you

To stick around, without a game

And nothing to pursue.”

She stared at him softly

“Why don’t you let me decide

If it’s worth it or not

To stay by your side.”

And so he began

To speak of what he knew was true

And her search was finally over

When he said, “I love you.”

Skål

Throw caution to the wind

Don’t wait for it to fly back around

Kick karma where it stands

And let your feelings stand their ground

Don’t ever let them win

And don’t let them bring you down

But occasionally let them know

You miss when they’re not around

Always show your cards to the table

And never bluff, even if you’re able

Don’t engage in petty squabbles

And never drink to become stable

Don’t do what everyone else does

And live life with the reason “Because”

Don’t let disasters happen faster

By becoming their cause

Live life to the fullest

But don’t become full of yourself

Light up another idea

And Skål to good health!!

They Just Rearrange

F---! I don’t know what to write

Just wish I didn’t have to sleep alone tonight

I don’t want to keep doing this

I just wish I didn’t have to miss

And I’m worried it won’t go my way

And I’d be lying if I said I didn’t fear that pain

I swear to God I’m going insane

I’m not depressed, but I’m not the same

And things never change

They simply rearrange

But nothing’s the same

Yeah nothing’s the same

I can’t do things for you

Without thinking of me

And you can tell me I’m sweet

But it’s not what I need

I don’t deserve any of it

If that’s truly how I feel

I see internal ulterior motives

And I hope they aren’t real

And things never change

They simply rearrange

But nothing’s the same

Yeah nothing’s the same

If I have to live with that feeling

Every time I see you

Then I can honestly say

I don’t know what I’m going to do

My heart swells up

But then it starts to hurt

I debate whether it’s all worth it

But know that none of it’s deserved

And things never change

They simply rearrange

But nothing’s the same

Yeah nothing’s the same

And she likes him

But he needs someone else

And he likes her

But she needs someone else

We just keep dancing here

Because the same song will never finish

Anxiously awaiting our next partner

Because our personal wants never diminish

And things never change

They simply rearrange

But nothing’s the same

Yeah nothing’s the same

A Happier Thing?

So here’s the story:

I’ve been trying to write

The ideas come in the day

And they linger in the night

I found time when I wasn’t

Predisposed with the world

Bogged down by textbooks

Or captivated by that girl

The only problem is

They’re a bit too depressing

And just once I wanted

A nicer song to sing

So… Once upon a time

There was a man of great distinction

He had an ability to rhyme

But wavered in his convictions

He lived life high above

With his head in the sky

He had never been in love

But he was willing to try

Then one day he did gaze

With his view from up there

A girl with a beautiful face

Than any he could compare

Entranced by her beauty

Gold locks and green eyes

Forgot that which was duty

Now met by surprise

And he began to fall

“Timber!!” called a boy from the land

But the man couldn’t hear the call

And no one caught him with their hands

The man didn’t know what to do

And everything went dim

After time the man came to

Seeing green eyes on him

She held him there at peace

Company for a fall from above

His racing heart would not cease

And he knew it must be love

And they lived happily ever after

Or something to that extent

See, I can write happier things

So don’t think that I can’t

To be honest, I don’t really care

How depressing my rhymes may be

I just wanted to prove a point:

That all of this is a part of me.

So you can worry that I’m depressed

Or you can take it all in stride

Just don’t blame me for the fact

That I have nothing to hide.